Maynard and boats
03-22-01 ~ 10:15 a.m.

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Today's Song Of Choice:

metaphor for a missing moment
pull me into your perfect circle
one womb
one shape
one resolve
liberate this will to release us all

gotta cut away, clear away, snip away and sever this umbilical residue
that's keeping me from killing you
and from pulling you down with me here

i can almost hear you scream
give me one more medicated peaceful moment
because i don't want to feel this overwhelming hostility
gotta cut away, clear away, snip away and sever this umbilical residue
that's keeping me from killing you

Orestes by A Perfect Circle

I chose this song because it's absolutely beautiful, and . . . well, yeah . . . it's just beautiful.

It kinda ties into the dream I had last night . . . (that's right . . . my plans to do my reality entry are crushed and brushed aside yet again) . . . so here goes.

Alright . . . . I'm with my family and we're living somewhere completely new. We (my mom, dad and brother) go to this concert type thing at what looks kinda like the inside of Qualcomm stadium (in San Diego) . . . So, we're sitting in the seats, and I look down on the frield. Sitting right below where we are is Maynard (from Tool and A Perfect Circle) and some chick who kinda looks like him.

I grab my brother and we go down and sit on the field close to where they are. Maynard gets up and goes somewhere, so we scoot closer - like right next to the lady (chick, whatever). This girl (lady, whatever) had been coloring, and she picked up the pen and started coloring on my skirt when she suddenly just fell asleep on my shoulder. Maynard comes back and explains that she does that a lot . . . some sort of disorder

The next scene is my brother and I (again) at what seems to be Maynard's house/lands It was bright and sunny outside, and Maynard and this other guy were walking around on a grassy field. My brother and I started walking on that field too.

My brother pulls out these scipts and says that Maynard and the guy who he's with are working on this movie and we should pretend like we are too, so he goes over and talks Maynard into doing a practice run of a few scenes.

We all start, then I realize I don't have a script. Maynard comes over and shares his with me.

Eventually we're done and I finally introduce myself to him and his friend. His friend takes my hand and kisses the back of my fingers about where the nails are, then he hands my hand to Maynard who kisses the back of it a few times (I have this thing with guys kissing the back of my hand . . . sue me . . . *smiles*)

They invite us inside for the party that's going on, and on the way in I get stopped by a group of guys that seem overly interested in me .. . I remember one of them had this strange look in his eyes . . . he had very light green eyes, almost frosty green . . . and dark red hair.

Anyway, I got away from them and continued inside. Once inside both my brother and I got handed a glass of wine and a plate of chocolate.

We mingled, but after a while I was tired of mingling, so I went to this other room and laid down on the couch. There was a guy on the couch too. He had gorgeous eyes and really nice blonde hair. Him and I talked and we were still talking when my brother came in to tell me he was leaving and if I wanted to get home, then I better get up.

The guy offered to take me home, which produced mixed feelings. I liked him, and I liked where I was at, but I was almost ashamed of where I lived, and I wasn't sure if I wanted him to see it, but in the end I stayed.

He took me home later, and came up the "steps" with me and we sat there talking and cuddling for a while longer. Well, a long while longer. It was morning by the time he left.

I lived in this small fenced in, run down trailer-ish place . . . . it was much nicer on the inside, but it looked so sad looking on the outside. I apparently lived there with my immediate family, my aunt, an old friend of mine, Ami Wall, and some small little boy.

So the guy leaves, and my family questions me about him. My dad says something like "how's he any better than all those guys you wouldn't ever date?" and I don't really know what to tell him.

Moments later there's a knock on the back door.

The guy was back and he wanted to see me again. I smiled at this 'cause I did like him, and usually when I like a guy, they don't have the same interest in me.

So anyways, we talked and he mentioned something about wanting to sleep. He also mentioned something about me, him, my family, spring break on his boat, sailing to somewhere near Kenya . . . or was it Zaire . . . . I don't remember,

Anyway . . . in the next scene, him and I are on his speed boat (not the boat he was planning the "sailing to Africa" trip) and we were out with a friend of his who were in their boat. We were speeding along, and I was loving it . . . It was beautiful . . . sparkling water and everything . . .

We were going to this island, and his friend yelled something about if we skip over this ramp, hit the next one with just enough speed, we could clear the bridge . . .so he goes off and does it. we stop the boat and walk like normal people . . .

The guy in the boat does indeed clear the bridge . . . but he almost hits quite a few people along the way, and at the end he does hit two kids, knocking them off a deck-like thing and into the water below. They're stunned, but not hurt (amazingly).

By the time we get there, the guy in the boat was getting yelled at and he was trying to defend himself by pointing out the caution sticker on the front of his boat, as if that means that he can do what ever he wants and if he hits someone, it's their fault for getting out of the way.

And that's the end.

It was actually teo separate dreams, but they ran together, so I just typed them up together . . .

That's a lot of reading, so I'll be off for now. Perhaps the next entry will be reality.

Until then


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