I think I'm going to quit
Friday, May. 31, 2002 ~ 12:11 a.m.
first | previous | random | next | last
At the moment, these lines are definitely my theme: So this is odd, the painful realization that all has gone wrong.
And nobody cares at all, and nobody cares at all.
. . .
And breathing is a foreign task and thinking's just too much to ask
and you're measuring your minutes by a clock that's blinking eights . . .My vacation request was denied. Marc denied it because it's "over the holiday weekend." And when I told him that I had to housesit for my aunt, he said there was nothing he could do about that. And it's all fucking bull shit. Every last word. Other things were frustrating me today as well. I'm just glad that Janet wasn't working. If she were, then it's quite possible that I would have left right then and there. What's really bad is that I've been off work for 4 hours and I'm still feeling extremely frustrated. I still feel like I need to calm down and take deep breaths. But that feeling's slowly fading to one of hopelessness. I was hoping to transfer stores, but I just don't think that's going to be happening. I have a feeling that I won't be at the store during the time that I requested my vacation. I have a feeling I'm going to be quitting before then. Perhaps right before then. I'm almost positive that I'll be able to pull the money together that I'll need. I'm going to pull all my money out of the stock plans as well as selling the stock that I got from the last go around. That should give me at least $1000. Plus my vacation pay which will be another $400+. I'm going to sell my car and I'm going to see about cashing in a savings bond or two for the rest. And, if that's still not enough, I'll swallow my pride and ask my parents for some help. Maybe I'll ask my dad for what-ever help he might be able to give me as well. I guess they've just pushed me too far at work. I'm just fed up and I hate the way I've been feeling. I was at the brink of tears quite a few times today, and it seems like every time I walk into that store, I start feeling frustrated . . . even if nothing's happened. I'm going to sit down and talk to Brian on Saturday and see what other options I have as far as getting time off. If I have to, I will finally go to the doctors and tell them that work is a big part of why I've been feeling like I have and that I need a break, but that they won't give me the time off I need. But I'm starting to like the idea of me quitting more and more. That would mean that I wouldn't have to disappoint my little brother, which is a very important thing. 0 comments so far   
| 
